Ability is of little account without opportunity.

If everyone likes you, you're not doing it right.

I regret the passing of the studio system. I was very appreciative of it because I had no talent.

I never thought I was funny. I don't THINK funny.

Television is the quickest form of recognition in the world.

Women's Lib? Oh, I'm afraid it doesn't interest me one bit. I've been so liberated it hurts.

You see much more of your children once they leave home.

I am a real ham. I love an audience. I work better with an audience. I am dead, in fact, without one.

People either have comedy or they don't. You can't teach it to them.

Knowing what you can not do is more important than knowing what you can do. In fact, that's good taste.

Love yourself first and the rest of your life will fall into place.

Love yourself first and everything falls into line.

It wasn't love at first sight. It took a full five minutes.

Luck? Luck is hard work - and realizing what is opportunity and what isn't.

I'm not funny. What I am is brave.

Whether we're prepared or not, life has a habit of thrusting situations upon us.

In life, all good things come hard, but wisdom is the hardest to come by.

Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead.

Now get the hell out of here and go change the world.