I got some new underwear the other day. Well, new to me. - Emo Philips quotes

I got some new underwear the other day. Well, new to me.

Author: Emo Philips

See all Emo Philips Quotes

Emo Philips Quotes - I've been wrestling with reality for most of my life. I'm pleased to say I've won.

I've been wrestling with reality for most of my life. I'm pleased to say I've won.

Author: Emo Philips

Emo Philips Quotes - I used to be scared of pretty girls, until one confessed they're just as scared of me.

I used to be scared of pretty girls, until one confessed they're just as scared of me.

Author: Emo Philips

Emo Philips Quotes - Not everybody hates me. Only the people who've met me.

Not everybody hates me. Only the people who've met me.

Author: Emo Philips

Emo Philips Quotes - I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

Author: Emo Philips

Emo Philips Quotes - I'm learning Cuban. It's like Spanish, but with fewer words for luxury items.

I'm learning Cuban. It's like Spanish, but with fewer words for luxury items.

Author: Emo Philips

Emo Philips Quotes - The Scots are a very tough people. They have drive-by headbuttings. In Glasgow a sweatband is considered a silencer.

The Scots are a very tough people. They have drive-by headbuttings. In Glasgow a sweatband is considered a silencer.

Author: Emo Philips

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