I told my wife she looks sexy with black fingernails. Now she thinks I slammed the car door on her hand on purpose. - Emo Philips quotes

I told my wife she looks sexy with black fingernails. Now she thinks I slammed the car door on her hand on purpose.

Author: Emo Philips

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Emo Philips Quotes - I picked up a hitch hiker. You've got to when you hit them.

I picked up a hitch hiker. You've got to when you hit them.

Author: Emo Philips

Emo Philips Quotes - I've learned that you can't make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they'll panic and give in.

I've learned that you can't make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they'll panic and give in.

Author: Emo Philips

Emo Philips Quotes - Don't wear fur! Did you know, a single fur coat takes fifteen trees, just for the protest signs?

Don't wear fur! Did you know, a single fur coat takes fifteen trees, just for the protest signs?

Author: Emo Philips

Emo Philips Quotes - When I was ten, my family moved to Downer's Grove, Illinois. When I was twelve, I found them.

When I was ten, my family moved to Downer's Grove, Illinois. When I was twelve, I found them.

Author: Emo Philips

Emo Philips Quotes - I lent a friend of mine $10,000 for plastic surgery and now I don't know what he looks like.

I lent a friend of mine $10,000 for plastic surgery and now I don't know what he looks like.

Author: Emo Philips

Emo Philips Quotes - So I'm at the wailing wall, standing there like a moron, with my harpoon.

So I'm at the wailing wall, standing there like a moron, with my harpoon.

Author: Emo Philips

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