When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out. - Humor Quotes

When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.

Humor Quotes

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A good laugh makes any interview, or any conversation, so much better.

A good laugh makes any interview, or any conversation, so much better.

Never do anything out of hunger. Not even eating.

Never do anything out of hunger. Not even eating.

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.

Housekeeping is like being caught in a revolving door.

Housekeeping is like being caught in a revolving door.

My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.

My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.

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