Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.

To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people!

Humor is the weapon of unarmed people: it helps people who are oppressed to smile at the situation that pains them.

Humor is one of the best ingredients of survival.

A sense of humor is a major defense against minor troubles.

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.

A good laugh makes any interview, or any conversation, so much better.

Never do anything out of hunger. Not even eating.

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.

Housekeeping is like being caught in a revolving door.

My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.

If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.

The hustle brings the dollar. The experience brings the knowledge. The persistence brings success.

Make your move.

Don't you dare give up.

When I started flirting with the hustle, failure became my ex. Now engaged to the game and married to success.

Don't let idiots ruin your day.

Give yourself more credit.