Some people get an education without going to college. The rest get it after they get out.

Our lives, our liberty, and our property are never in greater danger than when Congress is in session.

Don't wrestle with pigs. You both get dirty and the pig likes it.

Some people bring joy wherever they go, and some people bring joy whenever they go.

Consider the average intelligence of the common man, then realize 50% are even stupider.

If you have no will to change it, you have no right to criticize it.

In the beginning of a change the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.

Behind every successful man, there is a woman - And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.

Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.

Necessity is the mother of taking chances.

A gentleman is someone who knows how to play the banjo and doesn't.

Those who do not read have no advantage over those who cannot read.

We have the best government that money can buy.

Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.

If we would learn what the human race really is at bottom, we need only observe it in election times.

Good judgement is the result of experience and experience the result of bad judgement.

God created war so that Americans would learn geography.

I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.