Look, if I'd wanted a lecture on the rights of man, I'd have gone to bed with Martin Luther.

I would never be a television presenter. It's not something I could ever do.

My personal problem is that I take the business of film-making so seriously that I find it very difficult to relax.

If you're a serious actor, it's when you know you're going to die tomorrow that you really start to feel it.

I consider myself more of a visual comedian than a physical one.

I think you're bound to get a sense of any character that you play. It's not something you often do in comedy.

I don't think you should be too absolutist about what you play and what you don't play.

It's a bit disconcerting being treated like Madonna.

I'm more critical of the films I make than anyone else.

Lord, thy one-liners are as good as thy tricks. Thou art indeed an all-around family entertainer.

I like to juggle with one ball at a time. Then I put the ball down and do nothing for extended periods of time.

It's not easy to take a sitcom and turn it into a feature.

Your services might be as useful as a barbershop on the steps of a guillotine.

Marketing is what gets you noticed.

Nope, I don't enjoy work generally. Not because I'm lazy; it's just all so stressful and worrying.

You're about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest.

The path of my life is strewn with cow pats from the devil's own satanic herd!

I have always worried about things more than I should.

I want to express myself differently. I have a performing inclination.