Happiness is discovering the prune juice your doctor ordered you to drink has fermented. - Johnny Carson quotes

Happiness is discovering the prune juice your doctor ordered you to drink has fermented.

Author: Johnny Carson

See all Johnny Carson Quotes

Johnny Carson Quotes - Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place.

Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place.

Author: Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson Quotes - Happiness is.....finding two olives in your martini when youre hungry.

Happiness is.....finding two olives in your martini when youre hungry.

Author: Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson Quotes - Never ask your wife if she still hears from her old pimp.

Never ask your wife if she still hears from her old pimp.

Author: Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson Quotes - Democracy is welcoming people from other lands, and giving them something to hold onto. Usually a mop or a leaf blower.

Democracy is welcoming people from other lands, and giving them something to hold onto. Usually a mop or a leaf blower.

Author: Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson Quotes - I hear that whenever someone in the White House tells a lie, Nixon gets a royalty.

I hear that whenever someone in the White House tells a lie, Nixon gets a royalty.

Author: Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson Quotes - Happiness is having a rare steak, a bottle of whiskey, and a dog to eat the rare steak.

Happiness is having a rare steak, a bottle of whiskey, and a dog to eat the rare steak.

Author: Johnny Carson

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