Democracy is buying a big house you can't afford with money you don't have to impress people you wish were dead. - Johnny Carson quotes

Democracy is buying a big house you can't afford with money you don't have to impress people you wish were dead.

Author: Johnny Carson

See all Johnny Carson Quotes

Johnny Carson Quotes - Happiness is having a rare steak, a bottle of whiskey, and a dog to eat the rare steak.

Happiness is having a rare steak, a bottle of whiskey, and a dog to eat the rare steak.

Author: Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson Quotes - I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.

I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.

Author: Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson Quotes - Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.

Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.

Author: Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson Quotes - If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.

If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.

Author: Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson Quotes - Whatever you do, you're going to be criticized.

Whatever you do, you're going to be criticized.

Author: Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson Quotes - May you have the income of a Republican and the sex life of a Democrat!

May you have the income of a Republican and the sex life of a Democrat!

Author: Johnny Carson

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