Funny Birthday Wishes and Messages

Add a touch of laughter and lightheartedness to their special day with funny birthday wishes that will make them smile. Our collection of witty messages and hilarious greetings will help you bring some cheer and amusement to their celebration. Easily copy and download your favorite funny wishes to share with your loved ones on their birthdays.

It’s your birthday! You're now a year closer to being that old guy who yells at kids to get off his lawn.

It’s your birthday! You're now a year closer to being that old guy who yells at kids to get off his lawn.

You know you've hit middle age when your back is hairier than your head.

You know you've hit middle age when your back is hairier than your head.

May you celebrate this birthday the way you celebrated the first one: naked and screaming.

May you celebrate this birthday the way you celebrated the first one: naked and screaming.

You might be prehistoric  but at least you're not extinct

You might be prehistoric but at least you're not extinct

I've already alerted the fire department, so go ahead and light the candles on your cake.

I've already alerted the fire department, so go ahead and light the candles on your cake.

  May this day bring a lot of smiles and happiness to you, my dear friend. Wishing you a great and grand birthday!

May this day bring a lot of smiles and happiness to you, my dear friend. Wishing you a great and grand birthday!

  The world is a little bit brighter because of you. Happy Birthday, buddy!

The world is a little bit brighter because of you. Happy Birthday, buddy!

  Never have I had such a close friend. Happy birthday to you and best wishes always!

Never have I had such a close friend. Happy birthday to you and best wishes always!

  Having you as my friend is a privilege to me. Happy birthday. You are precious.

Having you as my friend is a privilege to me. Happy birthday. You are precious.

  Every day you sparkle but today you rule!

Every day you sparkle but today you rule!

  I am looking forward to many more years of friendship and birthdays with you. Have a fantastic birthday!

I am looking forward to many more years of friendship and birthdays with you. Have a fantastic birthday!

  Never think you are alone, I am always there for all your fixes.

Never think you are alone, I am always there for all your fixes.

  I promise that the more birthday candles you blow, the more I will be here for you to celebrate every special event in your life.

I promise that the more birthday candles you blow, the more I will be here for you to celebrate every special event in your life.

Smart, good looking, and funny. But enough about me. Happy birthday!

Smart, good looking, and funny. But enough about me. Happy birthday!

  Happy Birthday, you’re closer to seeing another century pass.

Happy Birthday, you’re closer to seeing another century pass.

  Oh yeah, one more year to annoy everyone you know. Happy Birthday, anyway!…

Oh yeah, one more year to annoy everyone you know. Happy Birthday, anyway!…

  I’m not a fan of overly sweet messages as you know, birthdays are for fun! So let’s ditch the old folks later and get out and about like we used to!

I’m not a fan of overly sweet messages as you know, birthdays are for fun! So let’s ditch the old folks later and get out and about like we used to!

  Don’t you think it’s about time we grew up a bit and stopped painting the town? I know exactly what you’ll say. Next year.

Don’t you think it’s about time we grew up a bit and stopped painting the town? I know exactly what you’ll say. Next year.

  I can’t believe how big you’re getting! Long gone are the days when I could steal cake from your plate and no one would ever be the wiser.

I can’t believe how big you’re getting! Long gone are the days when I could steal cake from your plate and no one would ever be the wiser.

  To my brother who still owes me several big ones. I didn’t get you a gift this year, so let’s call it even.

To my brother who still owes me several big ones. I didn’t get you a gift this year, so let’s call it even.

  Don’t let your age get you down, it won’t be long until you are allowed to start learning to drive. But until then, on your bike!

Don’t let your age get you down, it won’t be long until you are allowed to start learning to drive. But until then, on your bike!

  It’s about time one of us turned 18! Drinks are on you, then! Happy Birthday!

It’s about time one of us turned 18! Drinks are on you, then! Happy Birthday!

  Seeing as I usually forget everyone’s birthdays, you should consider it a miracle that I’m sending you this message.

Seeing as I usually forget everyone’s birthdays, you should consider it a miracle that I’m sending you this message.

  We thought we would get the right amount of candles to put on your cake this year, but quickly ran out of space.

We thought we would get the right amount of candles to put on your cake this year, but quickly ran out of space.

  Adding yet another year to your age is probably the worst thing that has happened in your life so far. And guess what, it will keep happening again and again, and again.

Adding yet another year to your age is probably the worst thing that has happened in your life so far. And guess what, it will keep happening again and again, and again.

  On your birthday today let’s pray together and hope that a genius scientist invents a machine that reverses ageing.

On your birthday today let’s pray together and hope that a genius scientist invents a machine that reverses ageing.

  If you were a cell phone, I think it would have been time to give you an upgrade.

If you were a cell phone, I think it would have been time to give you an upgrade.

  It is believed that as people turn older, they tend to get choosier and pickier. That is why I played it safe and got you an Amazon gift card so you can satiate your idiosyncrasies and buy something that you really want.

It is believed that as people turn older, they tend to get choosier and pickier. That is why I played it safe and got you an Amazon gift card so you can satiate your idiosyncrasies and buy something that you really want.

  The only cool thing about turning older is that you can claim to be mature, even though you are not.

The only cool thing about turning older is that you can claim to be mature, even though you are not.

  Don’t be too happy about the many candles on your cake. They just signify that you’re getting older.

Don’t be too happy about the many candles on your cake. They just signify that you’re getting older.

  A lot of people will come and go in your life, but good friends like me will stay forever. On that note, you must also know that birthdays come go, but your age will keep increasing forever.

A lot of people will come and go in your life, but good friends like me will stay forever. On that note, you must also know that birthdays come go, but your age will keep increasing forever.

  We look forward to celebrating your birthday by going out and having a lot of fun. Do you know why? Because you’re paying.

We look forward to celebrating your birthday by going out and having a lot of fun. Do you know why? Because you’re paying.

  Most people say that age and maturity are directly proportional. You must be an exception.

Most people say that age and maturity are directly proportional. You must be an exception.

  If you get old so fast, no one will believe that we are friends, so slow down.

If you get old so fast, no one will believe that we are friends, so slow down.

  Best friends never lie to each other and I must be honest with you. Damn, you’re getting old.

Best friends never lie to each other and I must be honest with you. Damn, you’re getting old.

  I hate most social norms so I did not get you a birthday gift. But the only social norm that I don’t mind is attending birthday parties.

I hate most social norms so I did not get you a birthday gift. But the only social norm that I don’t mind is attending birthday parties.

  All your birthday parties will also be meaningless if you don’t have friends like me to enjoy them. Happy birthday and thanks for the invite.

All your birthday parties will also be meaningless if you don’t have friends like me to enjoy them. Happy birthday and thanks for the invite.

  The only reason I tolerate you all year round, is because you throw awesome birthday parties.

The only reason I tolerate you all year round, is because you throw awesome birthday parties.

  As your best friend, I’ll save you from all the problems that life throws at you except one – getting old. Don’t believe me? Take a look in the mirror.

As your best friend, I’ll save you from all the problems that life throws at you except one – getting old. Don’t believe me? Take a look in the mirror.

  Birthdays will come and go, but your youth is lost forever.

Birthdays will come and go, but your youth is lost forever.

  The ability to take better decisions and showing a heightened sense of responsibility are some of the typical traits of maturity – except in cases like yours.

The ability to take better decisions and showing a heightened sense of responsibility are some of the typical traits of maturity – except in cases like yours.

  I got you the most expensive and luxurious anti-aging beauty gift hamper. Use it well, you will need it.

I got you the most expensive and luxurious anti-aging beauty gift hamper. Use it well, you will need it.

  I would give you a trip to the moon and a holiday to an exotic island as your birthday gift. I only wish you returned the money you owe me first.

I would give you a trip to the moon and a holiday to an exotic island as your birthday gift. I only wish you returned the money you owe me first.

  Did you just turn a year older? I feel your pain, I really do. But don’t worry because we are all in this boat called Life together.

Did you just turn a year older? I feel your pain, I really do. But don’t worry because we are all in this boat called Life together.

  The wrinkles on your face say that you are old, your maturity levels say that you are a teenager while your birth certificate says something completely different. What should I trust?

The wrinkles on your face say that you are old, your maturity levels say that you are a teenager while your birth certificate says something completely different. What should I trust?

  The true meaning of our friendship is that we can celebrate your birthday even if you are broke and you can be happy even if friends don’t have enough money to buy you a gift.

The true meaning of our friendship is that we can celebrate your birthday even if you are broke and you can be happy even if friends don’t have enough money to buy you a gift.

  On your birthday don’t forget to set goals that are sky high, and spend the rest of the year miserably trying to build a rocket to get there.

On your birthday don’t forget to set goals that are sky high, and spend the rest of the year miserably trying to build a rocket to get there.

  Getting someone as awesome as me to send a birthday message to you, has undoubtedly been your biggest achievement this year.

Getting someone as awesome as me to send a birthday message to you, has undoubtedly been your biggest achievement this year.

  It is amazing to see what a big difference one year can make in a person’s life. Last year, you were stupid and this year you have suddenly turned stupider.

It is amazing to see what a big difference one year can make in a person’s life. Last year, you were stupid and this year you have suddenly turned stupider.

  Don’t worry, I am right here by your side to help you mourn the death of your youth.

Don’t worry, I am right here by your side to help you mourn the death of your youth.

  Age is a funny thing because it adds years to your life, and also subtracts years from your life. Whichever way, it is never good news.

Age is a funny thing because it adds years to your life, and also subtracts years from your life. Whichever way, it is never good news.

  When I look at you, I can’t think of the worst part of getting older – because everything about it seems equally bad.

When I look at you, I can’t think of the worst part of getting older – because everything about it seems equally bad.

  OLD is an abbreviation for Obsolete, Lazy and Dull. Congratulations for turning one year OLDer.

OLD is an abbreviation for Obsolete, Lazy and Dull. Congratulations for turning one year OLDer.

  Some people may tell you that age has added grace and maturity to your looks. That’s just a nice way of saying that you have become old and boring.

Some people may tell you that age has added grace and maturity to your looks. That’s just a nice way of saying that you have become old and boring.

  Today I can write to you with the most beautiful sentences. But with how lazy I am, you will still be left wanting. That you keep in mind that for that reason, I do not love you less, that you know that I love you, that for you, I would even be able to walk barefoot around the house.

Today I can write to you with the most beautiful sentences. But with how lazy I am, you will still be left wanting. That you keep in mind that for that reason, I do not love you less, that you know that I love you, that for you, I would even be able to walk barefoot around the house.

  On this special day, my birthday greetings are addressed to a person who has made my life a joy, a person who made all my days special and fun times that you fulfill many more.

On this special day, my birthday greetings are addressed to a person who has made my life a joy, a person who made all my days special and fun times that you fulfill many more.

  How many fun moments I remember, how many birthdays together, but if I remember correctly, I never gave you anything on any birthday, because as you know, I am a person of customs, another year will be.

How many fun moments I remember, how many birthdays together, but if I remember correctly, I never gave you anything on any birthday, because as you know, I am a person of customs, another year will be.

  I wanted to write you the funniest of all the Funny Birthday Wishes, but to me that of congratulations, I prefer to wait to see you at your celebration and make you happy in person. Postscript, this is copied from the internet.

I wanted to write you the funniest of all the Funny Birthday Wishes, but to me that of congratulations, I prefer to wait to see you at your celebration and make you happy in person. Postscript, this is copied from the internet.

  My elders said that years are like snot. The more you have, the harder it is for you to breathe. Enjoy this very special and beautiful day. God bless you and your snot!

My elders said that years are like snot. The more you have, the harder it is for you to breathe. Enjoy this very special and beautiful day. God bless you and your snot!

  Have a lot of fun on your birthday, let’s remember that one day you were young and you were infinitely happy, but don’t forget to enjoy that you were never so old.

Have a lot of fun on your birthday, let’s remember that one day you were young and you were infinitely happy, but don’t forget to enjoy that you were never so old.

  Today I woke up feeling like a Chinese food sauce, in a bittersweet sensation, sweet for being your birthday, sour for seeing you grow old so quickly.

Today I woke up feeling like a Chinese food sauce, in a bittersweet sensation, sweet for being your birthday, sour for seeing you grow old so quickly.

  Today we value the beauty of love, the beauty of hugging each other. I think that in this way it could go unnoticed that I forgot to buy your gift again.

Today we value the beauty of love, the beauty of hugging each other. I think that in this way it could go unnoticed that I forgot to buy your gift again.

  Today I finally receive my cell phone case by mail. Aaaa and it is also the day of your birthday. I wish you blessings and happiness with your family.

Today I finally receive my cell phone case by mail. Aaaa and it is also the day of your birthday. I wish you blessings and happiness with your family.

  Today will be another one of those happy, beautiful, fun, and funny nights because we will celebrate the birthday of one of the best people that exists. I hope you can continue to celebrate the years on my side. I love you so much, honey.

Today will be another one of those happy, beautiful, fun, and funny nights because we will celebrate the birthday of one of the best people that exists. I hope you can continue to celebrate the years on my side. I love you so much, honey.

  Today I want to send my anniversary greetings to a person that I do not love much, but that destiny put in my life, today I want to congratulate your anniversary to the ugliest person in the world, to you.

Today I want to send my anniversary greetings to a person that I do not love much, but that destiny put in my life, today I want to congratulate your anniversary to the ugliest person in the world, to you.

  I had spent a few hours wanting to give you something beautiful, expensive and that you liked a lot, but I remembered that I could better save that money and send you a few sentences to congratulate you and wish you my best wishes.

I had spent a few hours wanting to give you something beautiful, expensive and that you liked a lot, but I remembered that I could better save that money and send you a few sentences to congratulate you and wish you my best wishes.

  Hello, I am the first of the messages that you will receive today; if not, you can pretend that I am; that way, you would make me very happy. May God bless you on this long-awaited day and fill you with joy today.

Hello, I am the first of the messages that you will receive today; if not, you can pretend that I am; that way, you would make me very happy. May God bless you on this long-awaited day and fill you with joy today.

  Congratulations, you already are, now I hope you do not want to be a little girl again lol.

Congratulations, you already are, now I hope you do not want to be a little girl again lol.

  After spending more than 3 minutes thinking about what to give you and not reaching a conclusion, I have decided to wish you receive what you want most. I think it will make you happy and it will be free.

After spending more than 3 minutes thinking about what to give you and not reaching a conclusion, I have decided to wish you receive what you want most. I think it will make you happy and it will be free.

  Conditions. Congratulations, enjoy your day and this beautiful year very much!

Conditions. Congratulations, enjoy your day and this beautiful year very much!

  I am looking to write the best of all the funny birthday quotes, but with the laziness that this topic gives me, let me tell you that I love you very much, that I wish you well and have a very happy anniversary day.

I am looking to write the best of all the funny birthday quotes, but with the laziness that this topic gives me, let me tell you that I love you very much, that I wish you well and have a very happy anniversary day.

  In this new year you will have hilarious moments when you start to be awkward walking, when you forget things, when you get wrinkles, you will see how funny those moments are. Happy day my love.

In this new year you will have hilarious moments when you start to be awkward walking, when you forget things, when you get wrinkles, you will see how funny those moments are. Happy day my love.

  I never wrote birthday wishes for people I didn’t want, today I will have to make an effort and try to make birthday wishes to make your sister happy. Congratulations brother in law funny !!

I never wrote birthday wishes for people I didn’t want, today I will have to make an effort and try to make birthday wishes to make your sister happy. Congratulations brother in law funny !!

  I would love to accompany this birthday greeting with funny wishes, but I will not because I remember then that you are the same age, and I get depressed too. Dear brother-in-law, may you be very happy in your day!

I would love to accompany this birthday greeting with funny wishes, but I will not because I remember then that you are the same age, and I get depressed too. Dear brother-in-law, may you be very happy in your day!

  Friend, don’t worry about your age. We all know that the older the wines, the better they taste, haha. Congratulations on your day.

Friend, don’t worry about your age. We all know that the older the wines, the better they taste, haha. Congratulations on your day.

  It turns many more years and slowly begins to age. Overall, we all know that old furniture tends to increase in value over time, haha.

It turns many more years and slowly begins to age. Overall, we all know that old furniture tends to increase in value over time, haha.

  One more year is not synonymous with old age. Your wrinkles are quality stamps of the best product that life can give you: wisdom, show them off, even if you are full of wisdom, my friend haha

One more year is not synonymous with old age. Your wrinkles are quality stamps of the best product that life can give you: wisdom, show them off, even if you are full of wisdom, my friend haha

  On this date as special as your birthday, I was thinking of a great trip to celebrate in a big way. So I thought if you could take care of my pet while I go around the world? Haha, Congratulations.

On this date as special as your birthday, I was thinking of a great trip to celebrate in a big way. So I thought if you could take care of my pet while I go around the world? Haha, Congratulations.

  I hope all your dreams come true. I challenge you to the following: compare your size of underpants with the previous year. How many sizes did you increase, hahaha? It’s not all about years in this life, haha.

I hope all your dreams come true. I challenge you to the following: compare your size of underpants with the previous year. How many sizes did you increase, hahaha? It’s not all about years in this life, haha.

  Excuse me, the enthusiasm of Halloween made me wait until today to wish you a great Happy Birthday. Trick or treat?

Excuse me, the enthusiasm of Halloween made me wait until today to wish you a great Happy Birthday. Trick or treat?

  Here I greet you late in the hope that you have also forgotten your birthday. Happy late birthday.

Here I greet you late in the hope that you have also forgotten your birthday. Happy late birthday.

  Sorry, we forgot about your birthday. I am sorry that you were excited about the possibility that we would be planning a surprise party for you. Happy birthday late, and let’s celebrate sometime on the weekend.

Sorry, we forgot about your birthday. I am sorry that you were excited about the possibility that we would be planning a surprise party for you. Happy birthday late, and let’s celebrate sometime on the weekend.

  Happy birthday to someone who was not welcomed into the world via tweet or a Facebook update.

Happy birthday to someone who was not welcomed into the world via tweet or a Facebook update.

  Happy birthday to someone I already said happy birthday to personally.

Happy birthday to someone I already said happy birthday to personally.

  I hope your birthday is as amazing as what your current life appears to be on social media.

I hope your birthday is as amazing as what your current life appears to be on social media.

  Happy birthday to one of the most tolerable people in the news from my personal Facebook account.

Happy birthday to one of the most tolerable people in the news from my personal Facebook account.

  If I don’t give you anything this year, don’t be offended, I’m saving for next. Happy Birthday!

If I don’t give you anything this year, don’t be offended, I’m saving for next. Happy Birthday!

Well done – you have still been alive for several years!

Well done – you have still been alive for several years!

  Welcome to that age when you forget your age. Happy Birthday.

Welcome to that age when you forget your age. Happy Birthday.

  Laugh and smile all you want while you have teeth left. Happy Birthday.

Laugh and smile all you want while you have teeth left. Happy Birthday.

  When you can’t run for years, jog; when you can’t jog, walk; When you can not walk, use a cane. But don’t stop! Happy Birthday 🙂

When you can’t run for years, jog; when you can’t jog, walk; When you can not walk, use a cane. But don’t stop! Happy Birthday 🙂

  May your 27-year-old finish much better than Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain, Amy Winehouse, and Jimi Hendrix.

May your 27-year-old finish much better than Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain, Amy Winehouse, and Jimi Hendrix.

  Congratulations on reaching an age when you stop pretending that you care about pop culture, technology, and your looks.

Congratulations on reaching an age when you stop pretending that you care about pop culture, technology, and your looks.

  Feel free to share them on your social networks or directly with the person celebrating your anniversary.

Feel free to share them on your social networks or directly with the person celebrating your anniversary.

  Wishing you another great year with newer wrinkles and greyer hairs.

Wishing you another great year with newer wrinkles and greyer hairs.

  The worst thing about your birthday is that everybody knows we grew up together and it reveals my age too. But still, happy birthday to my all-time bestie.

The worst thing about your birthday is that everybody knows we grew up together and it reveals my age too. But still, happy birthday to my all-time bestie.

  You are so old that there is a bonfire on your cake. But happy birthday!

You are so old that there is a bonfire on your cake. But happy birthday!

  Happy ‘two minutes of intense awkwardness when people sing around, and you have a hold on to that smile all that while!’

Happy ‘two minutes of intense awkwardness when people sing around, and you have a hold on to that smile all that while!’

  In case you feel lonely, neglected, unloved or simply forgotten, they say you should just take a loan and miss a few payments. Or better, just change your birthday to tomorrow on Facebook!

In case you feel lonely, neglected, unloved or simply forgotten, they say you should just take a loan and miss a few payments. Or better, just change your birthday to tomorrow on Facebook!

  Happy Birthday to the 18-year-old with 32 years of working experience.

Happy Birthday to the 18-year-old with 32 years of working experience.

  So where do you plan to spend your birthday at? The dentist’s place or at the chiropractor’s? Happy Birthday, dear!

So where do you plan to spend your birthday at? The dentist’s place or at the chiropractor’s? Happy Birthday, dear!

  Your birthday gives me one more chance to gift you stuff that I need. Happy Birthday dear brother!

Your birthday gives me one more chance to gift you stuff that I need. Happy Birthday dear brother!

  Happy Birthday, son! Your existence taught me the valuable lesson of protection of one’s assets.

Happy Birthday, son! Your existence taught me the valuable lesson of protection of one’s assets.

  You are just getting younger in reverse! Happy birthday!

You are just getting younger in reverse! Happy birthday!

  Wishing you the happiest of birthdays. May you have the energy and excitement of a 2-year-old but not the amount of their teeth.

Wishing you the happiest of birthdays. May you have the energy and excitement of a 2-year-old but not the amount of their teeth.

  Happy birthday dude. Enjoy another 365 days of an all-expense paid trip around the sun.

Happy birthday dude. Enjoy another 365 days of an all-expense paid trip around the sun.

  Good luck getting a cake big enough to fit all those candles!

Good luck getting a cake big enough to fit all those candles!

  Hit a donkey with your foot and have a kick-ass birthday!

Hit a donkey with your foot and have a kick-ass birthday!

  Wishing the most beautiful and intelligent person I know a great day. That’s me. And to you a very happy birthday.

Wishing the most beautiful and intelligent person I know a great day. That’s me. And to you a very happy birthday.

  Take two pieces of cake, one in each hand and you’ll be on a balanced diet.

Take two pieces of cake, one in each hand and you’ll be on a balanced diet.

  Happy birthday buddy. Don’t you worry about getting so old. That was something that happened years ago.

Happy birthday buddy. Don’t you worry about getting so old. That was something that happened years ago.

  Happy birthday man, and if someone calls you old, whack him with your walking stick.

Happy birthday man, and if someone calls you old, whack him with your walking stick.

  I was going to give you something awesome for your birthday, but they wouldn’t let me courier myself to you. Hence, Happy Birthday!

I was going to give you something awesome for your birthday, but they wouldn’t let me courier myself to you. Hence, Happy Birthday!

  I wish almighty embraces you with luck to follow up those dreams and also a bucket of water to wake you up from them.

I wish almighty embraces you with luck to follow up those dreams and also a bucket of water to wake you up from them.

  I hope you enjoy your birthday just like when you were born in this world. Without clothes.

I hope you enjoy your birthday just like when you were born in this world. Without clothes.

  Once in many years, people with great passion and brilliance are born into this world who aims at the greater things in life. And today one of them would like to wish you a very happy birthday.

Once in many years, people with great passion and brilliance are born into this world who aims at the greater things in life. And today one of them would like to wish you a very happy birthday.

  Another birthday comes by with more candles on your cake and less hairs on your head!

Another birthday comes by with more candles on your cake and less hairs on your head!

  Dear hubby,
You define my past and my future.
And as for the present, I could find nothing for you. So I bought one for myself.

Dear hubby, You define my past and my future. And as for the present, I could find nothing for you. So I bought one for myself.

  Happy birthday! I hope you get dope and happiness. Sorry, hope and happiness.

Happy birthday! I hope you get dope and happiness. Sorry, hope and happiness.

  Another year closer to getting those senior citizen seats on buses!

Another year closer to getting those senior citizen seats on buses!

  Blow me, says your lighted candle! Happy birthday buddy.

Blow me, says your lighted candle! Happy birthday buddy.

  Forget the past, forget the future and please forget the present too as I did forget to get you one. But happy birthday, dear.

Forget the past, forget the future and please forget the present too as I did forget to get you one. But happy birthday, dear.

  Happy Birthday! May you live to be old and toothless.

Happy Birthday! May you live to be old and toothless.

  Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Candles are years
Happy Birthday to you!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Candles are years Happy Birthday to you!