Frank Zappa Quotes, Thoughts and images

A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not open.

Music is the only religion that delivers goods.

The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons and 85% morons.

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

Reality is what it is, not what you want it to be.

The most important thing to do in your life is to not interfere with somebody else's life.

Stupidity has a certain charm - ignorance does not.

Modern Americans behave as if intelligence were some sort of hideous deformity.

Politics is the entertainment branch of industry.

It gets harder the more you know. Because the more you find out the uglier everything seems.

Republicans stand for raw, unbridled evil and greed and ignorance smothered in balloons and ribbons.

The only difference between a cult and a religion is the amount of real estate they own.

Anything played wrong twice in a row is the beginning of an arrangement.

There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.

Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff.

The last election just laid the foundation of the next 500 years of the Dark Ages.

It's better to have something to remember than anything to regret.

You know, people are basically shitty. It's when they prove it over and over again that it gets obnoxious.

If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.

I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird.

I'm not black, but there's a whole lot of times I wish I could say I'm not white.

Without deviance from normality, there can be no progress.

Beware of the fish people, they are the true enemy.

I don't want to see any religious people in public office because they're working for another boss.

There's a big difference between kneeling and bending over.

Nobody looks good with brown lipstick on.

A wise man once said, never discuss philosophy or politics in a disco environment.

I enjoy irritating the people who enjoy being irritated.

To me absurdity is the only reality.

Environmental laws were not passed to protect our air and water, they were passed to get votes.

There are more love songs than anything else. If songs could make you do something we'd all love one another.

Don't go to bed with any woman crazier than you are.

Let's not be too rough on our ignorance, it's what makes America great.

I am the slime oozing out from your TV set. You will obey me while I lead you, and eat the garbage while I feed you.