Josh Billings Quotes, Thoughts and Images

As a general rule, if you want to get at the truth - hear both sides and believe neither.

Health is like money, we never have a true idea of its value until we lose it.

When the truth is in your way, you are on the wrong road.

Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.

The best time for you to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust.

Most people when they come to you for advice, come to have their own opinions strengthened, not corrected.

Men mourn for what they have lost; women for what they ain't got.

Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.

There are two kinds of fools: those who can't change their opinions and those who won't.

Time is like money, the less we have of it to spare the further we make it go.

The man who has never been tempted doesn't know how dishonest he is.

One of the greatest victories you can gain over someone is to beat him at politeness.

Money will buy a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail.

A learned fool is one who has read everything and simply remembered it.

Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.

The great art of writing is knowing when to stop.

Marrying a woman for her money is very much like setting a rat-trap, and baiting it with your own finger.

There is not a whole lot of fun in medicine but there is a whole lot of medicine in fun.

The trouble with most folks isn't their ignorance. It's knowin' so many things that ain't so.

Men who have much to say use the fewest words.

The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the one that gets the grease.

The best way to convince a fool that he is wrong is to let him have his own way.

Silence is one of the hardest arguments to refute.

As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand.

Don't mistake pleasure for happiness. They are a different breed of dogs.

I never knew a man troubled with melancholy, who had plenty to do, and did it.

Genius ain't anything more than elegant common sense.

Opinions should be formed with great caution, and changed with greater.

Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess, and yet all the honesty in the world ain't lawful tender for a loaf of bread.

There's a lot of people in this world who spend so much time watching their health that they haven't the time to enjoy it.

Music hath the charm to soothe a savage beast, but I'd try a revolver first.

Wisdom deprives even poverty of half its power.

Love is said to be blind, but I know some fellows in love who can see twice as much in their sweethearts as I do.