40+ Best Woody Allen Quotes

In today`s post, we have brought some inspirational quotes by Woody Allen( Woody Allen quotes motivational) that you can easily copy and paste to share on Instagram, WhatsApp, and Facebook!

Motivational
Inspirational
Positive
Short
Wisdom
Unique

Woody Allen Motivational Quotes

Eighty percent of success is showing up. - Woody Allen quotes

Eighty percent of success is showing up.

Woody Allen

I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch. - Woody Allen quotes

I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.

Woody Allen

I'm giving [my analyst] one more year--then I'm going to Lourdes. - Woody Allen quotes

I'm giving [my analyst] one more year--then I'm going to Lourdes.

Woody Allen

In my next life I want to live backwards. Start out dead and finish off as an orgasm. - Woody Allen quotes

In my next life I want to live backwards. Start out dead and finish off as an orgasm.

Woody Allen

Some drink deeply from the river of knowledge. Others only gargle. - Woody Allen quotes

Some drink deeply from the river of knowledge. Others only gargle.

Woody Allen

Woody Allen Inspirational Quotes

Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem. - Woody Allen quotes

Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem.

Woody Allen

Standing in a garage no more makes you a car than standing in a church makes you a Christian. - Woody Allen quotes

Standing in a garage no more makes you a car than standing in a church makes you a Christian.

Woody Allen

I am not afraid of death. I just don't want to be there when it happens. - Woody Allen quotes

I am not afraid of death. I just don't want to be there when it happens.

Woody Allen

A man that has never lied to a woman has no respect for her feelings. - Woody Allen quotes

A man that has never lied to a woman has no respect for her feelings.

Woody Allen

I'm really a timid person - I was beaten up by Quakers - Woody Allen quotes

I'm really a timid person - I was beaten up by Quakers

Woody Allen

Woody Allen Positive Quotes

Problems are like toilet paper. You pull on one and ten more come. - Woody Allen quotes

Problems are like toilet paper. You pull on one and ten more come.

Woody Allen

You'll live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to. - Woody Allen quotes

You'll live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to.

Woody Allen

Error, no keyboard. Press F1 to continue. - Woody Allen quotes

Error, no keyboard. Press F1 to continue.

Woody Allen

In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. - Woody Allen quotes

In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.

Woody Allen

If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans. - Woody Allen quotes

If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.

Woody Allen

Woody Allen Short Quotes

I once stole a pornographic book that was printed in braille. I used to rub the dirty parts. - Woody Allen quotes

I once stole a pornographic book that was printed in braille. I used to rub the dirty parts.

Woody Allen

All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we choose to distort it. - Woody Allen quotes

All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we choose to distort it.

Woody Allen

I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No. - Woody Allen quotes

I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No.

Woody Allen

Where did we come from? Where are we going? Is there possibility of a group discount? - Woody Allen quotes

Where did we come from? Where are we going? Is there possibility of a group discount?

Woody Allen

Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand. - Woody Allen quotes

Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

Woody Allen

Woody Allen Wisdom Quotes

His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy. - Woody Allen quotes

His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.

Woody Allen

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. - Woody Allen quotes

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.

Woody Allen

There are three rings involved with marriage. The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering. - Woody Allen quotes

There are three rings involved with marriage. The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.

Woody Allen

I don't know what I'm doing, but my incompetence has never stopped my enthusiasm. - Woody Allen quotes

I don't know what I'm doing, but my incompetence has never stopped my enthusiasm.

Woody Allen

Who's the bigger idiot, the idiot or the idiot who gets fooled by the idiot? - Woody Allen quotes

Who's the bigger idiot, the idiot or the idiot who gets fooled by the idiot?

Woody Allen

Woody Allen Unique Quotes

My relationship with death remains the same - I'm strongly against it. - Woody Allen quotes

My relationship with death remains the same - I'm strongly against it.

Woody Allen

I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer. - Woody Allen quotes

I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer.

Woody Allen

I had an IQ test. The results came back negative. - Woody Allen quotes

I had an IQ test. The results came back negative.

Woody Allen

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons. - Woody Allen quotes

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

Woody Allen

Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once. - Woody Allen quotes

Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.

Woody Allen

I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own. - Woody Allen quotes

I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.

Woody Allen

Existence for eternity could get a little boring... especially towards the end. - Woody Allen quotes

Existence for eternity could get a little boring... especially towards the end.

Woody Allen

All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door. - Woody Allen quotes

All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door.

Woody Allen

My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by a quaker. - Woody Allen quotes

My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by a quaker.

Woody Allen

The difference between sex and death is, death you can do alone and nobody laughs at you. - Woody Allen quotes

The difference between sex and death is, death you can do alone and nobody laughs at you.

Woody Allen

I don't know what I want, but I know what I don't want - Woody Allen quotes

I don't know what I want, but I know what I don't want

Woody Allen

A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there for the rest of your life. - Woody Allen quotes

A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there for the rest of your life.

Woody Allen

Why ruin a good story with the truth? - Woody Allen quotes

Why ruin a good story with the truth?

Woody Allen

If you take a frown and turn it upside down, the person you are holding by the ankles will soon pass out. - Woody Allen quotes

If you take a frown and turn it upside down, the person you are holding by the ankles will soon pass out.

Woody Allen

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else. - Woody Allen quotes

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

Woody Allen

The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty. - Woody Allen quotes

The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.

Woody Allen

Paranoia is knowing all the facts. - Woody Allen quotes

Paranoia is knowing all the facts.

Woody Allen

Love Quotes & Messages

Sad Quotes & Messages

Breakup Quotes & Messages

Angry Quotes & Messages

Love Status in Hindi

Sad Status in Hindi

Attitude Status in Hindi

Alone Status in Hindi

Good Night Status in Hindi

Good Morning Status in Hindi

Radhe Krishna Status

Birthday Messages

Birthday Messages for Mom

Birthday Messages for Dad

Birthday Messages for Friends